We hear wedding bells and we’re happy for you! But a wedding is just the first big occasion of a lifetime together. Have you thought of what comes after the big day? Is your bond strong enough to handle every problem that comes your way? We would urge you to consider premarital counseling to make sure your future goals are aligned.

When you’re in love, it is natural to overlook your partner’s faults. But before you tie the knot, you must lay all your cards on the table and discuss your future openly and honestly to ensure a long and happy married life. Premartial counseling happens to be one of the best ways to do that.

Is pre-marital counseling helpful?

Of course, pre-marital counseling is helpful! Pre-marital counseling is not just a solution for couples with relationship issues.

Research has shown that couples who take part in premarital counseling therapy experience a 30% happier marriage than couples who don’t.

Sometimes, even the best marriages can be tough and unfortunately, marriages don’t come with pre-made manuals on how to make it work.

Premarital therapy sessions provide valuable pointers on how to cope with marital disagreements and problems and will help you handle stressful marital challenges in future.

Here are some ways pre-marital counseling will help you:

Premarital counseling helps couples get to know each other better

We all have complicated feelings and thoughts that often remain unknown even to those closest to us.

While it is normal to assume that we know everything about the person we’re going to marry, we may have barely grazed the surface.

Premarital counseling is a great way to uncover new things about your partner that you never knew about.

Professional premarital counselors are trained to help you open up and talk about things you may not have shared while dating.

They help address unresolved emotional issues and buried feelings that may come between you and your future happiness.

Let us give you an example of how a premarital counselor can help you. Do you have trouble trusting your partner because someone cheated on you in the past?

Lack of trust can destroy your relationship and eventually lead to a divorce. Pre-marital therapy will help you confront your insecurity and find healthy ways to restore faith and staying connected with your partner in a meaningful way.

Premarital therapy helps couples communicate better

Even the happiest couples have disagreements and it is completely normal.

When two people start a life together, the occasional argument is inevitable. Pre-marital counseling will not help you avoid fights, but it can help you navigate conflict situations in a mature way like a well-rounded adult.

Small arguments often spiral out of control and result in screaming matches or even physical abuse. This can be toxic.

Pre-marital counseling is a great way for couples to learn how to fight fair in a marriage. Here are some the important fair fighting rules for couples recommended by marriage counselors.

• Do not belittle your spouse or shout
• Do not rudely interrupt your spouse when he/she is trying to express their point of view
• Never let your fights get physical
• Focus on the present problem without dredging up the past
• Never ever threaten divorce or separation

Premarital therapy helps couples define household expectations

According to a study conducted by Harvard Business School and the University of British Columbia, 25% of divorcees said fighting over household work was the number one reason for their divorce.

Setting household priorities before marriage can reduce instances of marital discord and anger. Domestic responsibilities should always be shared fairly, and partners should learn to show appreciation for the contributions of the other partner.

If one person is always shouldering housework with no help from the other, it will eventually lead to resentment, separation or even divorce.

During pre-marital therapy sessions, counselors encourage you to set realistic housework expectations and discuss them with your fiancé(e).

Who will do the dishes? Who will do the laundry? Will you take turns doing household tasks or will you have separate responsibilities? If you have a less-stressful job, should you take on more housework?

A pre-marital counselor will help you establish these expectations in a way that makes both parties are happy.

Premarital therapy helps couples define their sexual expectations

Spouses often have different notions about how physical intimacy should be. Your partner may have needs that don’t necessarily line up with yours. Such things can cause a great deal of frustration over time.

Sex is a critical aspect of a happy marriage and an unhappy sex life can gradually destroy your relationship.

Premarital therapy is a platform for open heart-to heart communication about your sexual needs, with the added advantage of having a neutral third party to act as a referee.

Although you may feel uncomfortable at the thought of sharing such details in front of someone else, it is actually quite helpful to have an impartial mediator.

Premarital therapy helps couples discuss their finances

Financial pressure is one of the main reasons for divorce. Money is a delicate issue for many people, and it is important to know each other’s financial situation before marriage.

Although it is an uncomfortable subject, you must make sure you are aware of your partner’s financial commitments. You should also talk about your future financial goals and plans before you get married.

For e.g., how do you propose to save? Do you want to put money aside for retirement or do you want to live in the moment? Do you want to buy a house, or do you prefer to rent? How do you meet each other half way without making each other feel resentful?

A good premarital counselor will make these conversations easier by encouraging an open dialog about finances.

The importance of premarital counseling cannot be stressed enough. Before committing to a lifelong union, you should definitely partake in an open conversation mediated by a third party to uncover any differences in opinion that may have gone unnoticed.